Spring season set a record with 107 teams competing for 21 championship trophies. Indoor football has exploded in Manitoba!
Championship weekend was characterized with a significant number of upsets, and a record number of bottom-seeded teams holding their respective championship belts when all was said and done!
Co-ed Division 1
Assassins Legends 42 Coed Guardians 40
The Coed Guardians were thwarted in their attempt for back-to-back championships when the veteran Assassins team put them in their sights. This game was incredible from start to finish as neither team had an answer defensively, so it was fitting that the game would go to overtime.
Both teams had their favourites at the wideout position as Kevin Robson scored 30 for the Legends (don’t complain Assassins!), while the Guardians’ James Teschuk put up 33 in the loss.
Coed Division 1 had its strongest contingent of teams in quite some time, and the caliber of play was unbelievable throughout the season, culminating in the game of the night!
Co-ed Division 2
Here for the Football 30 Unnecessary Ruff-Ness 12
Here for the Football avenged their Winter Season Division 2 championship loss against the Winter Season Division 3 champions.
The game was close late — that is until game MVP (and Winter Season MVP) Lauren Garbutt broke the game open with 18 points and an interception. The highlander Jason Cassie had two touchdown passes and an interception for the Ruff ones.
With the victory, here for the Football got back into the winner’s circle for the first time in years. They can carry their new found championship hardware into Division 1 next season, further solidifying the top division of coed.
Coed Division 3
Running Pylons 31 Army-Dillos 12
The Running Pylons started quickly as the Dillos couldn’t quite get out of their shells.
Armadillos are prolific diggers that excavate land for food and dig profound burrows for shelter but defending against U.S. college football players…not so much!
The Pylons were led by the 18 points from Caden Caligiuri, and the four touchdown passes from Derek Mills. After the onslaught, the Dillos instinctually rolled themselves into a ball, completely enclosing their bodies in their armor-like shell to defend against future indoor football predators. The Pylons, on the other hand, can shed their Pylon sobriquet with the victory!
Flag Football Division
Knights 54 Beer Leaguers 38
The former national champions were put in their place by the underdog, albeit Hall of Fame-worthy, team that is the Knights!
The Knights got around their round table and came up with a novel medieval war time strategy to defeat the mead drinkers. Their strategy – throw the ball to Jeremy Kornelsen on every play and dare the Leaguers to stop them. And 37-points later, and a game MVP in hand, Jeremy had brewed the once stout defence of the brown bottles. The barley pops will have to brew up a new redemption strategy for the templars in the summer season.
Division 1
Seafood City 35 Hunger James 34
Seafood City was the story of indoor, sweeping all three championships.
In the championship game the crustaceans trailed for most of the game against Hunger James. That was until a very untimely interception by the hungry ones in the dying minutes ultimately led to their downfall. But will their heel turn tarnish the lustre of their championship trifecta? After the game, Seafood City merged with their arch-rivals Peg City, to form PegFood City? SeaPeg City? Will this new team unite the land dwellers with the seafarers? Or will this city merger turn into the twisted, multi-name, winding, unconnected system of chaotic roads that are a callback to Winnipeg’s origins as 11 municipalities?
Division 2
Ducks 38 MonStars 1
The Ducks barely escaped their semifinal game by the webs of their feet. Learning from their mistakes, the waterfowl submerged the MonStars from opening whistle to merciful ending.
These ducks are not only well adapted for water, but they demonstrated to the MonStars that they are just as adept on land and in the air. Using the patented flying V formation, Neil “Hugh Quackman” Walton threw six touchdown passes, at least one to each duckling, and two to Cody “Quack Efron” Hunter. These Ducks took home the trophy, the championship belt, some mealworms, and an additional feather in their plumed cap.
Division 3
Illegitimate Children of North Bay 36 Cocaine Bears of North Bay 26
How can a bear on cocaine lose to a bunch of children? Unbeknownst to all, one of those children was the “Ursidae Slayer” Chaka Newman. Chaka bumped the bears for four touchdowns while preventing the nose nachos from mounting much of an offence on the other side of the ball.
The North Bay division has become a staple in the PIT spring league, bringing together players from all divisions based on the premise of fun and camaraderie. Players are drafted to a team, usually by people who have no idea who they are drafting. The end result? Good times, minus the bags of milk. Perhaps next year we will have to up the game in this division to include an away game in North Bay!
Division 4
Rouge Gods 47 Down to Football 35
Division 4 was stacked with players who could score. Division 4 was devoid of players who could stop players who could score. The season was delectable chaos.
Teams regularly put up 40, 50, 60 and even 90 (cough, cough, apologies, the league was choking on some milk) points in a game! It was not surprising that the final could continue the all-offence, no-defence divisional trend. The Rouge Gods had three players that put up a multi-score game, while DTF had one. That was the difference maker.
Division 5
Avengers 40 South Park Cows 21
This game featured the Avengers, arguably the greatest collection of superheroes on the planet, versus some dairy cows.
The Cows were ultimately turned into ribeye by the power of the infinity gauntlet that was Zach Regert. The town of South Park did put up more a fight than you would expect from a herd of bovines. This game was also a family affair, with the Haluik’s putting up three touchdown passes and 20 points for the livestock, while the Loewen’s had five touchdown passes, two interceptions, and seven points for the mutants.
Division 6
Meme Team 19 Fast Finishers 14
The Meme team needed a series of tiebreakers to go their way just to make it into the playoffs. From there, they defeated the top seeded and University of Manitoba-laden Bisons squad who had crushed the Memers during the regular season. From there, the team of memes avenged their 47-45 regular season loss against the Fast Finishers, shutting down their offence and in the process racking up four sacks and an interception. The Fast Ones swear it was the first time their offence finished so prematurely. The Memes for this game are endless.
Division 7
Turf Dawgs 27 VaudeVillians 20
In a division that had a five-way tie for first place (you read that right!), it was no surprise that the championship game would be a closely contested affair.
In the end, the VaudeVillians bit off more than they could chew as the Turf Dawgs played a game that belied their lack of experience in the big games. Led by the 18 points of Davis Low, the Turf Dawgs put up touchdowns in each quarter of the game. Fergus Branton led the musical bad guys with 13 points, but there just wasn’t enough theatrical variety to bring the stage reviewers back to victory.
Division 8
Andriys Dream Team 43 Game of Zones 33
Congratulations to Andriys, who were living the dream as the only team in the Spring season to go undefeated during the regular season and win a championship belt. These two teams had the top two offences and the top two defences, so it was going to be a barnburner!
The Game of Zones were coming off a walk-off victory in the semifinals, but their final game ended in the same disappointment fans had in the Game of Thrones final season. Andriys Dream Team was led by the superhuman 19 points of Zach Kent (unrelated to Clark) and the five touchdown passes of Justin Fontaine who was one sack short of hitting for the statistical cycle.
Division 9
Where’s the Speed 42 Venum 26
Where’s the Speed brought the speed as they ran past a defending champion squad that simply couldn’t keep up. Where’s the time gone for Where’s the Speed? Starting as the Greedy Smurfs more than a decade ago, the speed demons (speedy smurfs?) return to the winner’s podium, with some smurf-sized children in tow.
Reid “Solid Oak” Buchanan threw six touchdown passes, had an interception, and ran in a score, while Connor “The Night Show” Forrester has 24 points for former BFFFFLers. Venum couldn’t find their inner Dr. Rockso and instead ended up as just Bad Company.
Division 10
Washington Football Team 43 Post Dig Picks Route 33
Look what happens when Daniel Snyder is no longer an owner. The franchise sells a record number of season tickets, the city becomes a free agent destination, and the team wins its first PIT Football Championship. No more peanut gates, parking gates, master card gates, video gates, team name gates, franchise tag gates, corporate malfeasance gates, security deposit gates, revenue sharing gates, statue gates, and probably a dozen yet unknown gates. Instead, we get an offence that averaged 47 points per game in the playoffs catapulting Washington to their first championship since the 1992 season.
Division 11
Make Football Not Warcraft 19 Manitoba Moose 13
The machinimists shocked the football world! Needing to win a three-way tiebreaker just to get into the playoffs, the football Poindexter’s logged on to the playoffs ready to take on the final bosses. First by dispatching the top-seeded Fake TDs in the semis, then hunting the Manitoba Moose in the final.
Led by the two interceptions of Austin Sutherland, the warcraft defensive perimeter was almost impenetrable. The Moose had five interceptions on defence themselves but ultimately were pixilated by the machinimators who were playing in the future
Division 12
Honeysuckle Football Boys 39 Gutshots 7
The Football Boys got to suckle at the teat of the Football gods as they won their first-ever championship trophy. The Boys defeated a veteran laden Gutshots squad who can trace their identity back to the old UTFL days.
Another amazing division as every team had either a 3-2 or 2-3 regular season record. Despite this parity, the Honeysuckles went off in the playoffs, outscoring their opponents by a combined 94-7. Where did that come from?!? Nathan Wilson threw six touchdown passes to four different wide receivers as the Gutshots took a shot to the gut in this one.
Division 13
Banda Makers 19 Ninja Turtles 18
The Banda Makers avenged perhaps the greatest comeback in the Spring regular season to take home another championship title.
During the regular season, the Banda Makers scored to take a seven-point lead with one play remaining. Ninja Turtles QB Jason Gill proceeded to throw a 60-yard Hail Mary strike to bring the game within one, then hit the two-point convert for a victory that left the fans in shock! Cue the Banda Makers who came from behind to win their own one-point victory in the finals, led by the 19 points and three interceptions of Ben Ziprick and the three touchdown passes of Tarndeep Gosal.
If only these two teams could play a best of five. Some amazing football.
Division 14
Beers, Girls, Football 19 Sober Bros 18
Beers, Girls, Football reincarnated the memories of the Woodys team that were a force in divisions two and three over the past two decades. Coming out of retirement, they showed that they still had some gas in the tank, defeating the Sober Bros by a single point.
In a game in which the two teams combined for six interceptions and three sacks, there wasn’t much ground ceded to the offences. Fittingly, Hall of Famer Joey Fryza scored the winning point after a couple of years of self-imposed golf exile. Chasing a small ball around a course may have its calming charm, but nothing will get the adrenaline up quite like scoring the winning point in a football game and the championship glory that it imparts!
Division 15
Diamond Hands 24 Coco Melon 19
Coco Melon was the only team that could match Andryis Dream Teams perfect season.
The Melons juiced their opponents to the tune of an undefeated regular season, while being the highest scoring team, giving up the fewest points, and the only team with a positive point differential. None of that mattered as the curse of the top seed reared its ugly head (as it seemingly does every season in the PIT).
Diamond hands squeezed the melons at a rate of 725,000 pounds per square inch, rearranging their carbon atoms to win the hardware and solidifying their investments in meme stocks. All this after winning a tiebreaker just to make playoffs, a common theme throughout the playoffs. Sometimes its good to have diamond hands!
Division 16
Crusty Crusaders 28 Bomber Boyz 13
Why deviate from the norm? Another team that had to hope the tiebreaker fell their direction just to get into the playoffs, turns around and knocks off the first and second seeds to take home the title.
Avenging both their regular season losses en route to the championship, the Crusty ones were led by the three touchdown passes of Darryl Packulak whose career spans over four decades! The Bomber Boyz are a good young up and coming team, however they should take a page from the Crustys who showed their veteran savvy in crunch (crust?) time.
Redemption Bowl
Plot Twist, You are the Father of North Bay 36 Razzle Dazzlers of North Bay 32
Two brothers were opposing captains with their jersey names on the line, and more importantly their first-born children (so says the legends). So, stakes were high (those North Bay jerseys are nice)!
The Razzle Dazzlers took a 32-30 lead with under two minutes left in the game. Plot Twist drove the field but were unsuccessful on a third-down conversion seemingly ending the game. Then an M. Night Shyamalan movie ending was inserted. A (Editors Note: very) late roughing the passer penalty extended the drive. On the last play of the game Corey Hanssen hit Brent Fabris for the winning touchdown and ownership over the family lineage had shifted just like that.
Quite the plot twist for Plot Twist!
Spring MVP
Brayden Sul
Congratulations to Brayden Sul who won the Most Valuable Player award as voted by his peers for the Spring season. After each game, teams pick the MVP from their opponents. The player that accumulates the most votes during the season is anointed as the MVP. The MVP receives our championship belt (and an array of prizes from our sponsors). Brayden will have a stack of belts having also won championships in Division 3 with North Bay and Division 10 with the Washington Football Team.
A shout out to Lauren Garbutt who also won the overall MVP for most MVP votes across Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring seasons. Lauren receives a pair of Winnipeg Blue Bomber season tickets for her incredible run the past year!
The PIT Football league is the official touch football league of the Winnipeg Blue Bombers and Football Manitoba. Follow us @PITFootball on Instagram and Twitter to keep up with Canada’s largest non-contact football league or check us out at www.pitfootball.com
